Onesided Love Hurts
by andromeda90
Summary: The four horsemen disband as they are sent out to get their new trick started. It starts with Jack, who knows he doesn't have a chance. Merritt follows, who realizes the kid had the right idea. Henley is next, realizing that love is not enough. Until Daniel remains, waiting for his instructions. D/H, J/D, M/H
1. One Sided on Jack's Side

**Pairing:** Daniel/Henley, one sided Jack/Daniel

**Summary:** Jack knows he doesn't have a chance.

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**One Sided from Jack's Side**

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There had been elation, a feeling of floating and he could have sworn that the world stopped for that moment. He had been living in a life full of noises, never stopping, and for that one second, it was just them, the two of them. And just like that, the world slammed back into motion, causing Jack to reel back, nerves causing him to be jumpy. He laughed, wrung his hand, and tried his best to keep his cool. That had been the day they met.

It is stupid, he doesn't even know why he tries, because everyone can see it. It is so obvious, Jack isn't even sure he should be annoyed at their obliviousness or hurt by it. In front of them, he decides to go for annoyance, it is safer that way….it is safer to roll his eyes and make comments about how they need to wake up and smell the coffee. That is so much easier….except when it comes to Merritt, who knows everything and what he doesn't know, he accurately guesses.

Merritt doesn't say anything, only squeezes his shoulder or pats his back. Sometimes, he calls him kid and ruffles his hair, but that is only when the screams become too much, when Jack wants to run away, wants to tell them to just kiss, that he is getting tired of this dance, because it gives him hope that he knows he doesn't have. He knows that his feelings will never be returned and he knows that the pretty red head and the man with cute curls will end up together. That is the story and that is how it will end.

On those nights, when his mask begins to slip, Jack slips out at night, roaming the streets. He knows the streets, knows how to survive, and it helps him stay sharp. He can't afford to lose that, it is the reason why he is important, he knows that. He doesn't bother trying to lie to himself; he knows why he is there. He is there to do what the others can't with the knowledge of the streets that they don't have.

Some nights, he finds someone to take him home, finds someone who is willing to help him forget. It isn't a hard task; he doesn't lie to himself about being good looking either. It comes in handy and he doesn't shy from that.

Sometimes, he just sits on a bench, staring at the night sky, until the sun begins to peak. Then, only then, does he make his way back, not caring if he smelled of booze, smoke, or sex…. sometimes all three.

Usually he is good at hiding it, at pretending he had been there the whole night. Lately, it has become harder and he finds himself being yelled at.

Henley worries but it is always Daniel that hits the hardest. Henley raises her voice, but Daniel doesn't. The disappointment and disdain is clear in his tone and Jack always wants to punch him, and it is better than wanting to kiss him. Jack holds on to that feeling until Merritt steps in to lead Jack away. Jack can always count on big brother Merritt. By the end of everything, that is how he comes to see Merritt, who looks at Jack and keeps his secrets.

He doesn't know if his heart breaks the day he sees them kiss or if his heart had been broken the whole time. He can't tell. Truth, he doesn't want to know.

All he remembers is the elation, the relief, when a card with orders to move to California is placed upon his pillow. It lies there, like a light at the end of the tunnel, because he loves them all, but this….this he needs. To be away, away from everything that hurts. And just like the day he met Daniel, the world stops with his eyes locked upon the card, before it rushes back into motion and he can finally breathe.

There are no goodbyes, Jack hates goodbyes. He doesn't think he could stand it, either them caring too much or not caring at all.

He leaves them a souvenir instead, Merritt he leaves his sunglasses. Henley keeps his spoons. Jack leaves Daniel his pack of cards. It might be an obvious sign or maybe it isn't, Merritt will know, Henley might guess….Daniel….probably wouldn't get it. It should hurt, but that is Daniel and Jack understands that, even now.

Jack stands at the door and casts one last look around, memorizing everything. Who knows when they'll see each other again?

He leaves with what he came, his jacket and duffel bag. The world is out there, waiting for him and Jack is going to take it on. Later, he will see them again; this was only one step to the big trick Dylan was planning. Jack could do this, would do this, and later, when he saw Daniel again, his hand intertwined with Henley's, Jack wouldn't break anymore.


	2. Merritt Doesn't Like Sides

**Pairings**: Daniel/Henley, Jack/Daniel, Merritt/Henley

**Summary**: Merritt thinks the kid had the right idea

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**Merritt Doesn't Like Sides**

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Merritt finds the glasses hanging on the 'Do not DISTURB' sign hanging on his door. They sit there and Merritt knows, because those are the kid's favorite. He takes them and spins them around his finger, before hanging them on the neck of his shirt. It is only a matter of time before the others find out and Merritt tries to guess how they will react.

Henley will be the loudest, holding on to whatever Jack left her. Daniel, will be calm, frowning, mumble how he will come back, he always does. Not this time, and Merritt feels anger course through his veins at Daniel, and for a second he thinks he would actually break for once. It goes as quickly as it came, because Merritt knows the kid left for another reason than just Daniel.

Merritt trusts the kid and if he knows one thing, family comes first to him. He had never had one until now….so Merritt knows better than to storm into Daniel's face about this, but it doesn't stop him from glaring at him the moment he steps out of his room.

He was right. Henley is loud, calling out to Jack, wondering why his spoons were in her room. Jack is not there and she asks him, but he only shows the sunglasses in return. Daniel offers up the cards he found on his bedside and Merritt wants to laugh, because leave it to the kid, but Daniel doesn't notice it. Doesn't realize what the cards mean and Henley is worried over Jack to pay attention to them.

Merritt wants to laugh, but knows that it would only bring hell from Henley and Daniel. He only sits there and reads, listens to Henley rant about her anger, about not forgiving him for saying goodbye. Merritt knows she will forgive him, it is Jack, and they all did the moment they realized he left.

With Jack gone, he realizes how tiring it is, to be there, to listen to Henley and Daniel. Because Henley misses Jack, in a way that no one realized. Merritt had always known that Jack was like a little brother but it wasn't until then that he realized the extent of Henley's love for the young man. It makes Merritt wonders if her love for him runs as strong but he decides to ignore that thought, he vowed to himself the moment he realized the feelings between Danny and her that he would not go there.

He teases her and makes her laugh because it is all he can do. Because he doesn't allow himself to fall in love but he allows himself to love her and make her family. So he says nothing when she rants, when she is in a bad mood, when all she wants is to think and remember. He knows that is what she wants and he doesn't blame Daniel for not knowing. He is too wind up and can't handle the feeling of not being in control. Daniel wants to make Henley feel better, but she will only feel better in her own way, Daniel can't do anything and he can't understand that.

The mentalist spends his days out in the balcony of their small apartment, book in hand. He likes reading, always has, and if Henley joins him, saying nothing, well…Merritt returns the favor with silence of his own. He sees the way that Daniel bristles, the way he wants to pull Henley away, stand between them and Merritt laughs.

He realizes just how vital the kid was, that without him they are falling apart. He cannot live there, watching Henley and Daniel fight, watching them fall apart. Henley doesn't cry but her eyes remain glassy for most days and Daniel only practices his tricks, over and over.

Merritt tries to bring in laughter and smiles, most of the time he succeeds. Henley laughs and it brightens their days, the room, life. His life. It is then that Merritt realizes that the kid had the right idea, sometimes space is needed.

He finds the card in his pocket on his way back from getting groceries. He runs his thumb over the symbol of the eye, taking the information in. It was time for him to get the second part of the plan started. A smile settles upon his lips but it doesn't last because Henley won't be happy and Daniel….

No matter how annoyed they get at each other and how they rarely see eye to eye, Merritt will miss him. That statement was sign that the mentalist really needed to get away and rethink his life.

He doesn't leave in the middle of the night, no, he tells them. He has been sent to do something, and Henley saddens but she tries to smile. To say that it lightens Merritt's heart to know that she'll miss him, well, it might be mean, wouldn't it? but it does make him slightly feel better and seeing that even Daniel is frowning, well, that is a welcomed surprise.

By morning, he is gone, leaving them to live, like the couple they are. He wishes them good luck in his mind, hoping that Henley isn't terrible hurt, when things crash and burn. Because he knows it will, because sometimes, love is not enough and sometimes dreams don't pan out. Or maybe they do just not in the way you thought.

He'll see them again, he knows that. Until them, he hopes they survive each other.


	3. Henley Letting Go

**Summary**: She realizes that love is not enough

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**Henley Letting Go**

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She doesn't say anything for that whole day since she realized Merritt was gone. Instead, she sits outside in the balcony, staring out at the people walking, going on with their lives. Daniel keeps himself occupied and she cares, but not enough at the moment. No, not enough to start a conversation that will only end in screams.

They are doing that a lot lately, she thinks, remembering their many arguments they have had. Truth is, she loves Daniel, always had and always will. She knows this, ever since she met him, with his nervous, lopsided smile and nervous fingers and words. Always jittery, like he had drunk too much coffee.

She knows him, knows about his past, knows about the tough family that only knocked him down. She knows that he fears losing control, letting everything down because no one had done it for him before. He doesn't know the feeling of being loved. No. Not loved. His mother loved him. His grandparents loved him. His childhood friend who died at a young age loved him. He knows that feeling, he just doesn't know how to handle loss.

Henley knows that he is not her world, no matter her feelings for him, he is not her world. He was, before, at the beginning. When she used to stand on those little platforms, trying to not fall off….then, right then, he was her world and then….he wasn't. She loved him, but the spark in her eyes was gone and it was amazing she didn't choke him those last few days she worked for him. He had always been annoying.

Now, he stands nervously next to her as they go out. They don't hold hands anymore. They tried, but she doesn't feel it. There is only silence, him not knowing what to say, and her, having nothing to say. Not really. Nothing that matters. Nothing that matters _to him_.

Henley wants to say that she is sorry; wants to tell him that they will see them again; wants to tell him that Jack left him his cards and that is only sign that Jack cares for him more than he will ever realize; wants to tell him that Merritt doesn't hate him but he would rather die than say that out loud; wants to tell him that she loves him. She does love him, but there is no denying that he doesn't smile in a relaxed manner for her. His eyes don't softened, nor his shoulders slump, nor does he let himself be free to express himself….when he is with her.

A sign that he loves her, that he worries of losing her…..Henley wonders if he is afraid to realize that he never had her in the first place. She had him once and he had her, but now…..now….

They talk, softly, over dinner. Over meaningless things, about the past, about when she used to work for him. They don't hold hands. She doesn't sit next to him when they watch TV, if they even watch TV anymore. She sits out in the balcony and he goes out to roam the streets. There is no banter….there is no audience for them to banter for.

It comes like a punch to the gut, at the realization, that they were so used to being on the spotlight, that their relationship became a way of being in the spotlight. Their relationship was a show, a magic trick, always trying to find a way to escape, always pulling at each other.

Merritt would tell her that he told her so. She would glare at him and then laugh, because he was always making her laugh. She wishes he was there, making her laugh now. He always made her feel better.

That night, at her realization, that she loves Danny but is isn't enough…..she thinks about Merritt. It is that same day that she finds the card in the mail. It is her turn to go.

Daniel will be devastated. But he won't show it. Not to her.

Jack. Jack would try and make it better and he would succeed. For some reason he had a way of getting under Daniel's skin, so easily, without even trying….without even realizing he was doing it. Daniel could smile wide and laugh and relax and tell Jack that he was being an idiot but Jack would still be there. Jack understands Daniel, understands how he is afraid, hurt, angry, loving and gentle and Jack sees it all. In ways that Henley never could and probably never will.

She shows him the card as she enters the apartment, sees him freeze, sees the nervous smile on his lips. There is hurt somewhere in those eyes and Henley walks over and hugs him. She doesn't know when she'll see him again. Next time, their relationship will be nothing but platonic. They tried but it didn't work. But they tried, that is what mattered.

And now, they understand each other that much better. They trust each other that much more. She kisses him on the cheek, lingering there, before slipping away from his life.

She'll see him again. She'll see him, and Merritt and Jack.

Until then, there is a lot of work to do.


	4. Daniel Waits on the Line

**Summary**: Daniel waits for his instructions, and misses them

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**Daniel Waits on the Line**

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Daniel does not get his instructions until two weeks after Henley has left.

He spends those two weeks in the apartment, barely eating, barely even breathing. He doesn't know why he even wakes up, since he spends his days staring at the ceiling.

Sometimes, he swears he hears Henley, Merritt, Jack…the three of them, laughing, telling jokes. It brings a grin to Daniel's face but it quickly disappears when he remembers they are not there anymore.

He misses them, all of them. He thinks about Henley, the way she would come in, telling him to get up, that he needed to go out there before he got sick. He would protest but there would be no denying the warmth of being worried over. He misses that, the way she frets over everyone. He doesn't miss the arguments, they got tiring really quickly. He would like to think that their failed relationship is his fault, and that isn't easy to realize….but he also knows that it isn't fair to her. He cannot take the blame for something that just didn't work, it wasn't fair to her or him, because sometimes things didn't work out and it was ok. At least, it would be in time.

Merritt would roll his eyes and scrutinize him, before telling him that there would be no recuperating by moping. At least this isn't like when his pet Apricot died and Daniel would grumble that he never had a pet Apricot but by then Merritt would have gotten him out of his funk. Daniel misses that, the way that Merritt would with certain comments have people forgetting about their troubles and focusing on something else. He made Henley laugh, made Jack smile, and made Daniel forget.

Jack. Daniel missed Jack, more than he thought he ever would. He missed the way Jack would come in, jump over the back of the couch to land next to him and disturb the cards he had been practicing with. It annoyed Daniel to no end but no matter how many times he told him to stop, Jack would continue. He would continue to laugh, smile, ask Daniel for advice, look at him with an admiration that Daniel feared would one day be gone. Perhaps that is why he kept the kid at a distance, at least Daniel tried, but now he realized he hadn't succeeded.

Not since when he held Henley's hand all Daniel could think off was if the kid was alright. Not when he was the first person he thought of when he woke up and went to sleep. He doesn't understand why he thinks of the kid often, part of him doesn't want to think about it. Part of him glad Merritt is not there because he would know, because he just knows. The fact that there is something to know terrifies him to no end.

The week before he gets his instructions to move out, Daniel spends it out in the streets. He looks around the crowd, looking for a kid with a leather jacket and a mischievous grin. He looks for a tall man with a hat and important sunglasses. At moments he thinks he sees a redhead waving a gloved hand.

Daniel wonders if they miss him or if they are happy to be away from him. Away from the arguing, from his controlling nature, from his angry jabs.

Relief washes over him the day he sees his instructions. It was time for him to go out and start step number four. Belief him, Daniel is ready to get started.

Not only because it is something to do and he loves performing….but because this means he is close to seeing everyone again.

Who knows, maybe this will lead him to Jack, Henley and Merritt.

A thought makes him pause at the entrance of the door, just as he is leaving. What if he meets with Jack again, but there is nothing there, there is no admiration, no understanding like he used to? Daniel slips his hand into jacket, where Jack's deck sits, a comfort.

He doesn't think about why he is worried about Jack, about seeing him. Daniel doesn't want to acknowledge that he is putting Jack over Henley, his ex-girlfriend, close friend, who he had known for years now. No. Daniel wasn't quite ready for that. He decides to not think about it.

He takes his bag and walks out of the apartment, wondering when he'll see everyone else again.

It will be four months before he sees one of them again. It just happens to be Jack that he meets up with first.


	5. Seeing Daniel Again

Summary: After six months, Jack sees Daniel again

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**Seeing Daniel Again**

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Jack is away from his family, because that is what they are to him, for about six months now. There are still days where he expects to see them, where he swears he's heard their voices.

It is on the end of the sixth month that he sees him. J Daniel Atlas. A hand lands on his shoulder and Jack whirls around, eyes wide, only widening when he realizes who stands there. They stand there, neither saying anything and Jack doesn't know what to say. He had imagined how it would be like to see them again, getting instructions to go to this apartment where they would all be sitting. He would stand there and everything would be like normal.

Jack didn't expect to freeze, to find himself unable to breathe because all this time he thought he was over it, he wasn't.

"Hey." Daniel breaks the silence and Jack quickly grins and throws his arms around Daniel. Daniel tenses under him but his arms gingerly wrap around Jack.

"Hey man, was wondering when I will see you and the others again." Jack grins pulling away and turning around, but Daniel just shakes his head.

"It is only me." Daniel takes out his new set of instructions and offers them to Jack, who quickly snatches it up. Reading over how the two of them were responsible for the next act.

"But Henley and Merritt are ok, right?" Jack asks, looking at Daniel, eager for information, but Daniel just shifts and frowns.

"They were when I last saw them. They are also out with their own set of instructions." Daniel tells him and Jack saddens because he misses them, but Daniel is there, and even if Jack figures that this isn't good for his health, there is no denying that his crush is still there.

"Ok, well come on, man, hungry? Can tell me about all the antics you guys got into, yeah? Things here have been….hot…." Jack laughs and he tells Daniel about what he has been doing, wooing the people with his tricks. Jack doesn't mind that Daniel doesn't talk much, but he does laugh and that is enough. Jack wants to ask Daniel all these questions, but Daniel is calm, peaceful, Jack doesn't want to ruin that, so he entertains.

It is not until later that night as Jack tries to find a place for Daniel to sleep, that Daniel finally opens up.

"Henley was really mad when she found out you left." Jack flinches because he can see that. He doesn't ask if Daniel was mad. "Merritt knew of course, I didn't understand at first. It wasn't the same without you." Daniel adds and this makes Jack flush and grin wide, because even if that was all he ever got, it would be enough.

"I think these belong to you."

Jack looks down at the cards being pressed down to his hand, expecting to see his deck but finds that these are one of Danny's. He takes them in his hands and looks them over.

"I didn't take care of yours as well as I should have. Some cards are bended, thought it be best to give you those." Daniel rambles, he is nervous, agitated, wanting to control the situation but he can't. Jack understands, and so he laughs and shakes his head.

"Might be a bit bended, but you still have them right? Besides, my cards are made to stand tough stuff, they do break thinks in half after all." Jack takes Danny's deck and slips it into his pockets, before going back to making the sofa into something comfortable to sleep on.

"Here." Daniel takes over on fixing his bed and Jack just watches. He does not feel lonely anymore and it is funny how this feels like the first time he met Danny, except better.

"I'll live." Daniel mutters once he plops down on his 'bed' and Jack just smiles apologetically.

Jacks wants to ask him all these question, wants to talk, wants to tell him everything and anything. But they are both tired and Jack swallows back the words, replacing them with a good night instead.

The next day, they start playing tricks out in the street, simple things, getting back into the grooves of things. It takes them a day to get back to where they used to be and Jack is happy to show Danny what he has learned. He calls out to the people, puts up a show and it is worth it for the amusement and pride in Danny's eyes. He is doing one of Danny's tricks and he does it good, perhaps not perfect, but good enough.

That night, Danny tells him how Merritt left soon after. Henley left two weeks later. Jack guesses that their relationship didn't work out and he feels bad. He doesn't say anything on it, no point, Daniel's move on and Jack is sure Henley has to. So he instead turns on the TV and falls asleep with his head on Danny's shoulder.

Daniel is not easy to live with and he is high maintenance. Good thing is that Jack isn't, he likes to laugh, to enjoy life. He takes an easy view on life, preferring to take everything as it came. Sure, he had a temper of his own, but his free look on life made it easy to deal with Daniel. Jack likes making the coffee, turning on the TV, snatching things from Danny's hand and making him annoyed. It isn't threatening in the way it would have been with Henley and Merritt. This was not a battle of dominance, of taking control.

It is three weeks into living together, beginning to set everything up, that Jacks wakes up, head on Danny's shoulder. Danny is sleeping, arm thrown over Jack's shoulder, movie credits rolling. This is nice, Jack likes this. Daniel cares for him and Jack….cares more than he should about Danny…..but for now…this, resting his head on Danny's shoulder is enough.

Jack smiles as he falls back to sleep.


End file.
